A Breakfast
by Dina45
Summary: The Marauders interupt a family breakfast. Marauders as badboys. One shot


Please Enjoy

Lily Evans was quite bored. Her sister, Petunia, had invited her boyfriend Vernon and his family in for breakfast. She had to get up so bloody early that it was dark out and she had just ran to the bathroom without a backwards glance. She was now sitting with them, pretending to enjoy herself. She stared at the five empty chairs and wished clowns would appear and give her a chance to escape in the confusion. Her mother was laughing forcibly at a joke Mrs. Dursley was telling. They were all whales of a people. Maybe it was a new species. "And I just couldn't help it I just- "the kitchen door opened and in strolled Sirius Black, wearing boxers, an unbuttoned dress shirt, and a loosened Gryffindor tie, and sleepy eyes. To top it off, he was smoking a cigarette. "Evans," he said in greeting. He sat down across to Mrs. Dursley and blew a smoke ring into her face. "Why such a formal breakfast?" before she could answer, the door opened again and Remus Lupin walked in this time, wearing some long pj pants and nothing else. "Good Morning, Lily. Very fancy, no?" he gestured to the lace tablecloth, crystal glasses, and silver cutlery. He sat next to Sirius. "R Remus? What are you doing here?" "What? Oh, we wanted to say hi, but were too drunk to apparate, so we crashed here. Did you know you can get high off of cough medicine?" Lily shook her head. "No. But how- "the door opened a third time. "Got a drink, Prongs?" asked Sirius. James Potter collapsed into the third chair and put his feet up on the fourth. "You got it, Padfoot." He took out a bottle of Jack Daniels, took a sip, and handed it to Sirius. He was wearing black boxers and a sweater with the sleeves pushed up. "All right, Evans?" he said. "Potter?" Lily whispered. "Alright, what's going on here?" said Vernon angrily. Sirius looked at him, smirked, and said, "Who's the whale?" Mrs. Dursley gasped. "How dare you speak to my Vernon that way?" James and Remus snorted. Sirius raised his eyebrows at her, almost daring her to test him. Lily and her parents didn't know why they were here, but they were a welcome distraction from the Dursleys. Sirius blew another cloud of smoke into Mrs. Dursley's face. Mr. Dursley was too busy stuffing his face to care. "What's for breakfast?" asked Remus. Lily gestured to the food on the table, smiling. The boys began helping themselves. Sirius put the cigarette out on Petunia's purse, which was next to him. Petunia gasped. "Lily, get these freaks out of here!" but it was difficult for her to say so, and this was also the reason why she hadn't spoken until now. Vernon was indeed a whale, but the Marauders were most definitely not. The tie around the cigarette boy's neck was just begging to be wrapped around a hand and yanked, the faint and almost invisible happy trail leading down from the blonde's navel, and the last one was the best, with messy hair any woman would want to sink her fingers into. They gave off quite the bad boy vibe. Lily frowned. Her sister could be very rude sometimes. She decided to have some fun. She got up and walked around the table to Sirius. She grabbed his Gryffindor tie and pulled his face close to hers. She put her mouth to his ear and whispered quietly. "I must say, Black, I can't even think of a proper hex for you lot. Your timing is amazing, thank you. This dinner is hell." Sirius whispered back, "Why tell me like this?" "To put on a show. Play along?" Sirius smirked. "Defiantly. What about Prongs?" "His ego would explode from over inflation if this was him." Sirius turned Lily around and pulled her into his lap. "True," he whispered. Petunia started. "Lily?" she couldn't believe it. She had always looked down on her sister and her freaks, but Lily looked much better off than her, knowing three undeniably hot guys and sitting in the lap of one. Sirius finished off his breakfast just before his fellow Marauders with Lily in his lap. Both James and Remus had understood this was a game. Lily got up and took their dishes to the kitchen. The boys got up and James stretched. Mrs. Dursley stared, her situation much like Petunia's. "So, we will just get out of your hair, then," said Remus. they all pulled out their wands, grabbed multiple pieces of cutlery and food and then transfigured them into wizard clothes, complete with a cloak. The Dursleys gaped. The boys, unaware of their shock, for they thought all of them were Lily's family and already knew about magic, quickly dressed. They were just fastening their cloaks when Lily came in, having finished with the dishes. She took in the shocked expressions, which included her parents because since she was underage she couldn't demonstrate. Speaking of which…." Aren't you underage? You lot are going to get me into trouble with the Ministry of Magic!" "You freaks have government? That's very- "James had had enough. He shoved his wand to her throat. "Speak to Lily like that again, and I will hex you so badly you won't be able to walk." Petunia gulped. Vernon was confused. If at any time before this morning somebody had shoved a piece of wood at him he would have laughed, but these boys had used it to change food into clothes, which meant they were dangerous. He felt around his pocket for his tiny revolver. Sirius was looking smug. He was having an amazing day. "Now, there, Lily-Flower, of course we're underage, but they can't catch us! You forget who you are talking to…. currently any magic done in your house cannot be detected by anyone." He watched Lily turn the color of her hair. She took a deep breath and prepared to shout, but before she could, the lump of a son pulled out a tiny metal thing. "Put your hands up!" he shouted. Everybody except for the Marauders did. In fact, they looked quite amused. "Merlin's beard, is he going to defeat three wizards with that plastic thing, Moony?" asked James. Vernon was confused. He had a gun. Why weren't their hands up? "I think it appears to be a muggle weapon, but it is so small!" said Remus, looking closely. "Fuck this," said Sirius, and he blasted it thing from the muggle son's hand. Then he said, "Petrificus Totalus!" The muggle's arms and legs snapped together and he fell to the ground. Sirius put his wand away and said, "Now that that's over," Mrs. Dursley and Petunia fainted. "Boys," said Lily. They looked at her. "You realized you just revealed the existence of magic to an entire family, right?" "What? They aren't your family?" asked Remus. "Hell, no." snorted Lily. Sirius sighed and said, "Well, there is an easy fix to that." He pointed his wand at the largest muggle, who was still stuffing his face. "Obliviate!" James and Remus did the same for Vernon and Mrs. Dursley. "There!" said James cheerfully. "Now it's all fixed!" Lily smiled. "I should be screaming at you for this but I was having such a bad time that I will not even jinx you. Potter!" she said. James looked up. "Yes, o center of my universe?" "Don't push it Potter. Not a word of this to the others. From any of you!" once they nodded she ushered them to the door. "Hey Remus? Question. Once you leave, will the Ministry be able to tract magic at my home again?" Remus nodded and pulled a stone with a lion carved into the top out of his pocket. "It gives out wards so the magic can't be seen." She nodded. "Hey Evans? Kiss me and I'll give you one." She looked up. James grinned. "I always carry extras." She glared at him for a moment, then darted forward and kissed his cheek. "Pay up." Looking like he was in heaven, he handed her a stone. Just as she was closing the front door she heard a shout. "LILY EVANS JUST KISSED ME!"


End file.
